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kABaTAanG pINoy

kiLOs kaBAtAaN... kAiLaNgaN Ka nG baYAn!
 
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» US preparing war on North Korea and Iran!
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» Tunay na kahulugan ng buhay...
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» Mga Pre. Masarap din magmahal ng tomboy...
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» BIG ONE AND WW3 IS COMING SOON...
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» PET LOVERS: SHIH TZU
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kABaTAanG pINoy :: Huntahan at Kulitan :: Anything Goes
 

 Another batch of old jokes.. :)

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+2
silip_lang
belle
6 posters
AuthorMessage
belle
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Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 8th 2008, 5:28 pm
Boy: pare hulaan mo ugali ko, nagsisimula ng letter A
Pards: approachable?
Boy: mali
Pards: amiable
Boy: mali pa rin
Pards: o sige, sirit na nga
Boy: Anest

Policeman arresting a prostitute
Prosti: I am not selling sex
Police: Then what are you doing?
Prosti: I'm a saleswoman selling condoms with free demo.

Pasyente: Dok, bakit po ganito ang operasyon sa ulo ko? Halos kita na utak ko
Doctor: Ok lang yan, yan ang tinatawag na open minded.

A naked girl rode on a taxi
"Bakit" asked the girl at the driver na nakatitig sa katawan nya "Ngayon ka lang ba nakakita ng hubad?"
Driver: "Hindi po miss, iniisip ko lang kung saan nakatago pamasahe mo"

Beauty contest
Emcee: What's the big problem facing the country today?
Contestant: Drugs
Emcee: Very good, why do you say that?
Contestant: Ang mahal kasi eh!

Amo: Bakit ka umiiyak?
Katulong: Sabi po ni dok tatanggalan po ako ng butlig
Amo: Butlig lang iiyak ka na...
Katulong: Kasi ok lang kung right lig or left lig lang po... pero bakit naman butligs pa.....

Doc: For your health take only a cup of rice, lean meat and a saucer of kangkong. Fruits for dessert and lots of juice....
Fat guy: Doc, shall I take them before or after meals?

Nahuling may kodigo ang estudyante.. .
Guro: Ano 'to?
Estudyante: Prayer ko po, ma'am!
Guro: At bakit answers ang nakasulat?
Estudyante: Naku! Sinagot na ang prayers ko!

Kulas: Miss, isa ngang siopao... 'yung babae.
Waitress: Babaeng siopao?
Kulas: Oo. 'Yung may papel na sapin. Kumbaga, napkin.
Waitress: Ahh, ganun po ba? Lalaki po ang nandito.
Kulas: Lalaki?
Waitress:Kasi po, may itlog sa loob.

Tomas: Ang galing ng aso ko!
Tuwing umaga, dala niya ang dyaryo sa akin.
Diego: Alam ko.
Tomas: Ha? Paano mo nalaman?
Diego: Ikinukuwento sa akin ng aso ko.

Josh: Kumusta ang assignment?
Ricardo: Masama. Wala akong nasagutan. Blank paper ang ipinasa ko.
Josh: Naku, ako rin! Paano 'yan? Baka isipin nila, nagkopyahan tayo?!

Toto: Pangarap ko, kumita ng P250,000 monthly gaya ni daddy!
Juvy: Wow! Ganyan kalaki ang kinikita ng daddy mo?
Toto: Hindi! [/size][size=9]'Yan din ang pangarap niya!

Dok: May taning na ang buhay mo.
Juan: Wala na bang pag-asa? Ano po ba ang dapat kong gawin?
Dok: Mag-asawa ka na lang ng pangit at bungangera.
Juan: Bakit, gagaling po ba ako ru'n?
Dok: Hindi, pero mas gugustuhin mo pang mamatay kesa mabuhay!

Lito: Pare, ano ba ang kaibahan ng H2O sa CO2?
Joseph: Diyos ko naman! Di mo ba alam 'yun?! Ang H2O ay water!
At ang CO2... cold water.

Gustong malaman ng magkaibigan kung may basketbolan sa langit.
Nagkasundo sila na kung sino ang unang mamatay ay babalik upang sabihin kung may basketbol sa langit.
Naunang namatay si Dado. Isang gabi, may narinig na boses si Rodel na parang kay Dado. Ikaw ba 'yan, Dado?" usisa ni Rodel.
"Oo naman!" tugon ni Dado.
"Parang hindi totoo!" sagot ni Rodel."O, ano, meron bang basketbol sa langit?"
Sagot ni Dado, "May maganda at masama akong balita sa 'yo.
Ang maganda, may basketbol doon. Ang masama...
kasali ka sa makakalaban namin bukas!"

Junjun: Magaling ang tatay ko! Alam mo, 'yang Pacific Ocean , siya ang humukay nun!
Pedrito: Wala 'yan sa tatay ko! Alam mo, yung Dead Sea ?
Junjun: Oo...
Pedrito: Siya ang pumatay nun!

Stewardess: Do you want a drink, sir?
Sir: What are my choices?
Stewardess: Yes or No.

Misis: Hindi ko na kaya 'to! Araw-araw nalang tayong nag-aaway. Mabuti pa, umalis na ako sa bahay na 'to!
Mister: Ako rin, sawang-sawa na! Away rito, away roon! Mabuti pa siguro, sumama na ako sa 'yo!

Misis: Delayed ako nang one month pero huwag mo munang ipagsabi. Nahihiya ako...
Mister: Okey.
Kinabukasan, dumating ang taga-Meralco. .
Taga-Meralco: Misis, delayed po kayo ng one month.
Misis: Ha? Bakit mo alam?
Taga-Meralco: Nasa record po.
Mister: Bakit naka-record diyan na delayed ang misis ko?
Taga-Meralco: Kung gusto ninyong mawala sa record, magbayad kayo!
Mister: Eh kung ayokong magbayad?
Taga-Meralco: Puputulan kayo!
Mister: Eh anong gagamitin ni misis?
Tag-Meralco: Pwede naman siyang gumamit ng kandila.

Juan: Pare, noong mayaman pa kami, nagkakamay kaming kumain. Ngayong mahirap na kami, nakakutsara na.
Pedro: Baligtad yata?
Juan: Mahirap kamayin ang lugaw, pare!

Anak: Itay, nagpapatanong si ma'am kung ano raw ang propesyon mo.
Itay: Sabihin mo, cardiologist.
Anak: Ano po ba ang cardiologist, Itay?
Itay: 'Yung taga-ayos ng radio sa car!

Rodrigo: Bakit bad trip ka?
Harry: Nagtampo sa 'kin ang utol ko.
Rodrigo: Bakit naman?
Harry: Nakalimutan ko kasi ang birthday niya.
Rodrigo: 'Yun lang? Anong masama ru'n?
Harry: Ang masama ru'n... twins kami! Twins!

***naligaw lang sa inbox ko.. lumang jokes.. tumawa pa din ako.. hehhe


Last edited by belle on September 10th 2008, 3:51 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : masyado palang maliit yung font.. heheh)
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silip_lang
Active Member
Active Member
silip_lang


Female
Dami ng Post : 3646
Puntos : 6352
Salamat : 2
Lokasyon : Balanga City, Bataan
Nagpatala : 2007-11-27

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 9th 2008, 6:36 pm
natawa ako sa stewardess hahaha..
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http://www.siliplang07.multiply.com
inang kalikasan
Junior Member
Junior Member
inang kalikasan


Female
Dami ng Post : 699
Puntos : 6133
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : nueva ecija,tarlac
Nagpatala : 2008-02-15

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 12th 2008, 11:23 am
pasali...

May panda na nagpa ID picture:

"pare,gusto ko colored ah."

Mrs. naghihintay kay Mr. gabi na wala pa..

Friend: Mare, baka may kinalolokohang babae!!!
Mrs.: Kaw naman! Ang sama agad ng iniisip mo! Baka naaksidente lang!
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gneth
Active Member
Active Member
gneth


Female
Dami ng Post : 3566
Puntos : 6054
Salamat : 1
Lokasyon : san juan city
Nagpatala : 2008-07-21

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 12th 2008, 1:56 pm
Rolling Eyes
belle wrote:
Policeman arresting a prostitute
Prosti: I am not selling sex
Police: Then what are you doing?
Prosti: I'm a saleswoman selling condoms with free demo.

kumusta naman toh!!!!!!!!!
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inang kalikasan
Junior Member
Junior Member
inang kalikasan


Female
Dami ng Post : 699
Puntos : 6133
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : nueva ecija,tarlac
Nagpatala : 2008-02-15

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 12th 2008, 1:57 pm
ahhhh...
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misay
Junior Member
Junior Member
misay


Female
Dami ng Post : 517
Puntos : 6048
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : umeå,sweden
Nagpatala : 2008-07-31

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 14th 2008, 2:19 am
belle wrote:

Junjun: Magaling ang tatay ko! Alam mo, 'yang Pacific Ocean , siya ang humukay nun!
Pedrito: Wala 'yan sa tatay ko! Alam mo, yung Dead Sea ?
Junjun: Oo...
Pedrito: Siya ang pumatay nun!


***naligaw lang sa inbox ko.. lumang jokes.. tumawa pa din ako.. hehhe

kamusta naman ito.. lols ^_^ natawa aku talaga.. hehehe
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http://profiles.friendster.com/michellebersamina
inang kalikasan
Junior Member
Junior Member
inang kalikasan


Female
Dami ng Post : 699
Puntos : 6133
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : nueva ecija,tarlac
Nagpatala : 2008-02-15

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 15th 2008, 4:12 pm
nurse:nasa isip mo ba ang pamilya mo?
baliw:oo naman!syempre!
(nurse natuwa)
nurse:asan ba pamilya mo ngayon?
baliw:nasa isip ko nga eh! tanga ka ba????
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belle
Moderator
Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 17th 2008, 4:07 pm
Titser: ampangit ng pangalan mo condrado.
Student: bakit naman ma’am?
Titser: panu, Condrado Domingo.. in short.. ConDom
Student: e ma’am, mas masagwa ang pangalan ng asawa niyo po..
Titser: aber.. bakit masagwa?
Student: Supremo Potenciano.. in short.. SuPot..hahahah
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silip_lang
Active Member
Active Member
silip_lang


Female
Dami ng Post : 3646
Puntos : 6352
Salamat : 2
Lokasyon : Balanga City, Bataan
Nagpatala : 2007-11-27

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 18th 2008, 3:54 pm
ahahhaa
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http://www.siliplang07.multiply.com
belle
Moderator
Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 24th 2008, 5:16 pm
dear pepsi,

alam mo bang cokez na cokez ako sayo..
Royal ka pa naman pero lagi mo akong iniiSprite..
naalala mo pa ba nong pumunta tayo sa Mountain Dew..
sumakay pa nga tayo kay Red Horse...
muntik pa nga tayo tangayin ni Gold Eagle beer...
buti nalang nandyan si San Miguel beer..

nagmamahal,
tuba
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inang kalikasan
Junior Member
Junior Member
inang kalikasan


Female
Dami ng Post : 699
Puntos : 6133
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : nueva ecija,tarlac
Nagpatala : 2008-02-15

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeSeptember 24th 2008, 7:01 pm
BRUNO:anu yang nasa papel na yan?
PEDRO:listahan ng mga takot sa akin.
B:bakit andyan pangalan ko??
P:bakit lalaban ka?
B:OO!
P:d ierase! pwede naman eh!

Nkapulot si Pedrong bote na may genie sa loob.

GENIE:hoho!bibigyan kita ng tatlong kahilingan.
PEDRO:1.gusto kong tumira sa malaking bahay.
2.gusto kong puti ang complexion ko!
3.gusto ko lahat ng babaeng makakakita sakin ay maghuhubad ng panty at papatong sa akin.
wohhhhhhhhhh...

NAGING TOLIET BOWL SI PEDRO..
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marya
Senior Member
Senior Member
marya


Female
Dami ng Post : 946
Puntos : 6223
Salamat : 0
Lokasyon : tuguegarao
Nagpatala : 2007-11-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeOctober 9th 2008, 10:44 pm
ate belle kakatawa! wuhahaha
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belle
Moderator
Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeOctober 21st 2008, 5:28 pm
Pedre: tol, nakakita ka na ng elepanteng nagtatago sa highway?
Juan: di pa! Bakit ikaw nakakita na?
Pedro: T_ng*! Panu mo makikita, eh nagtatago nga!!! :p


Lola: Amang wala akong pera:
Holdaper: Alam ko kung saan ang pera ninyo (Sabay pasok ng kamay sa bra ni Lola)
Lola: Ituloy mo iho, may dollars pa sa panty.. :p


Last edited by belle on January 30th 2009, 9:13 am; edited 1 time in total
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belle
Moderator
Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeDecember 3rd 2008, 1:50 pm
ANG PUSA.

Ina: bakit ba kanina pa masama ang tingin mo sa pusa natin?
Anak: e siya naman po ang nagsimula e! :p



Ang VICKS.

Sa buhay ko, maraming dumaan,, Problema, PAgsubok, Kawalan..
Pero nang dumaan ka... NATUWA ako..
Kasi ang Pabango mo ay VICKS! Smile



The Laway.

Ano ang dapat mong sabihin kung biglang tumulo ang laway mo
habang natutulog ka sa jeep? e di:
"Ano ba yan! Ang init sa jeep! pati bibig ko pinagpapawisan". :p
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belle
Moderator
Moderator
belle


Female
Dami ng Post : 4209
Puntos : 6581
Salamat : 7
Lokasyon : malapit sa tabi mo..
Nagpatala : 2008-02-08

Another batch of old jokes.. :) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Another batch of old jokes.. :)   Another batch of old jokes.. :) Icon_minitimeJanuary 28th 2009, 1:25 pm
water lily.

may nagtanung, bakit daw meron water lily sa tubig?

may sumagot, kasi dun daw nagtatago ang mga isda pag umulan.. Smile

hahah
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